7 Sources of Wonder

A framework for finding awe when things feel awful

Yesterday, I struggled.

A cold Monday in February, home with a kid who has been sick for a week? Yeah, maybe. All this (waves hand into the air)? Yup.

But wonder is in the ordinary, even on crappy days, and hey — I have made a personal commitment to finding one small moment of awe each day this year. And I may be just a *wee* bit compulsive when I want to be (and sometimes when I don’t want to be).

So as I drove to pick up my non-sick child from school, I mentally ticked through seven sources of wonder. They are forever etched in my brain because they are also the seven chapters of my forthcoming book, “Raising Awe-Seekers.”

And I’ve lived with this framework for so long now, that this list has become a mental framework for stealing a moment of wow on cold, hard days.

Seven Sources of Awe and Wonder

I’ll write more about each of these in the coming weeks, but here are the Cliff Notes (wait, does anyone under the age of 30 know that phrase anymore)?

1. Nature: This is perhaps the most obvious source of awe — sunsets, fluffy snowflakes, meteor showers, ocean waves, bird songs, flowers growing through sidewalk cracks. Need a reset? Go outside and just listen, look, and breath.

2. Music: As I wrote a couple of weeks ago, song is our first language. Sounds from childhood can transport us back in time. Music has a mysterious power to entrance, energize, and heal us.

3. Art: This broad category includes making art, seeing art, and experiencing the wonders of design. Sometimes I see a painting or a photograph — or walk into a cathedral or a courtyard — and I’m moved in ways I can’t articulate.

4. Big Questions: Think of the last time you read a book, listened to a podcast, or learned something new that made you sit up and say, “Wow.” Pondering big questions — and engaging with others who are doing the same — can put us in touch with meaning, cutting through our sound-bite society.

5. Collective Effervescence: This term describes the feeling of being part of a group — a group that is working toward a common, meaningful purpose. I titled the chapter “The Wonder of Belonging,” because engaging with community in this way reminds us that we are not alone. And that is a necessary, empowering feeling.

6. The Circle of Life: Birth and death. Saying hello and whispering goodbye. The delight when we see a baby’s tiny fingers and the grief-born-of-love we feel when someone dies. Intergenerational relationships — including learning about ancestors — can shape us and remind us that we are part of the long arc of humanity.

7. Human Kindness: Here’s something I love love love: the most common source of awe is witnessing other people’s goodness — kindness, courage, and integrity. We are moved by other people. That’s a key part of being a spy for hope for our kids.

Back to My Monday Story . . .

Okay, so as I drove to get my kid — with my head stuck in BLAH gear — I began to think through this list. And I consciously determined to keep my senses open for a song, a story, a shaft of light through the trees. And within seconds of thinking this, I got stuck behind a school bus — a bus that would be making at least 10 stops along this stretch of road. Ugh.

And yet. As I waited, I noticed a border collie sitting at full attention at the top of a long driveway. The moment his teenage human stepped off the bus, the dog bounded down the drive and circled the boy in irrepressible delight. And the teenager — who had come off the bus when his head down and his hair in his face — broke into a grin. And that was it. The goodness of a dog. The bond of belonging between the boy and his pup. A big question: Why do dogs make us feel so good?

And lucky you! I have a slice of an answer to that question. As I write in my book:

In an interview with NPR, Nancy Gee, director of the Center for Human-Animal Interaction at Virginia Commonwealth University, noted that interacting with dogs—even strangers’ dogs—can affect body chemistry. After spending a few minutes with a dog, most people experience a reduction in the stress hormone cortisol and an uptick in the “feel-good” hormone oxytocin.

Gee said, “I think it is safe to say that animals are beneficial to our mental and physical health.”

But why?

Megan Mueller, an associate professor of veterinary medicine at Tufts University, told NPR that dogs prompt us to experience the world more like they do: “Animals, and dogs in particular, live in the moment. They’re experiencing their environment with wonder and awe all the time, and they’re not bringing up what happened to them earlier in the day or what they’re thinking about in the future. They’re there right now.”

Watching that 15-second interaction between a dog and his kid brought me, briefly, out of the blah and into the wow. I’ll take that feeling, even for a moment.

Yours,

Deborah

P.S.

In preparation for the release of my book “Raising Awe-Seekers,” I’m keeping a wonder journal: One tiny entry each day about something that caught my attention, gave me goosebumps, brought tears to my eyes, or made me say, “Wow.”

365 Days of Wonder: Week 6

Day 36:

World Read Aloud Day! I got to video-read my book to 41 PreK students in El Paso. The stuffed puppy I bring with me to such things quietly waved to the kids as they filed into the library. Their faces as they all started waving back . . .

Day 37:

A beautiful family friend died today. She was 95, and I remember when -- at nearly 80 -- she spotted our family across the beach and ran full throttle to greet us, with a hand atop her head to keep her sunhat from blowing away. I want to age like that.

Day 38:

I brought Humfrid the Octopus with me on a school visit today. At the end of my presentation, a Kindergarten sidled up: "Can Humfrid give me a hug?"

"With 8 arms, he can give you a quadruple hug!"

[Protip to visiting authors: bring a stuffie along -- you never know who will need a hug.]

Day 39:

My 13yo had a leading role in Arsenic and Old Lace. At the end of the show, the director announced: “Our actors have been working on a comedy but they take the world seriously. We donate 100% of winter ticket sales to charity and I let them pick. They picked organizations that help immigrants and LGBTQ+ teens.” ❤️

Day 40:

Since taking up embroidery, I have slowly been tuning in to the many ways fiber arts have been used by women: preserve culture, nurture others, build community, and engage politically. The ancient Greeks imagined fate as three thread/spinners. We still use the phrase “fabric of society.” I’m wondering why I didn’t tap into this art sooner, but I am so glad it found me.

Day 41:

Finding a moment of wonder was harder today. So this afternoon while driving, I tried to keep my senses open. And almost instantly, I got stuck behind a school bus.

But but but . . . while stopped, I noticed a border collie sitting at attention. The moment his teenage person stepped off the bus, he bolted down the long driveway and danced happy circles around his kid.

Day 42:

Day 42: It was 14 degrees when I took the dog out this morning, but the dawn was full of birdsong. In a month, the migrating birds will start returning -- but I'm so grateful to these six diminutive creatures who stick around all winter.